February 2011
A Drinking Song
kiss-distinctly-american:
lickystickypickyme:
by William Butler Yeats
Wine comes in at the mouth And love comes in at the eye; That’s all we shall know for truth Before we grow old and die. I lift the glass to my mouth, I look at you, and I sigh.
5 tags
4 tags
OMG, I am So. Popular! (not) 2! people called me yesterday! …..To work for them tomorrow at 2nd job; I will… I have no Friday Life :-(
OMG, I am So. Popular! (not) 2! people called me yesterday! …..To work for them tomorrow at 2nd job; I will… I have no Friday Life :-(
I tweet; therefore, I am.
Blink 23 times #ThreeSeconds
Blink 23 times #ThreeSeconds
Whenever a new #Dictator rises to power, they always stroke their chin, gazing @ the moonlight, and think “this time, it will be different”
RT @Brain_Wash: When I explained Twitter to my mother she said, “Sounds like group therapy where no one’s getting better.” Well played, …
Pennies, Nickels, Dimes, and Quarters: #Change You Can #Believe In!
RT @MichaWard: Waiter, this medina is neither funky nor cold. Please inform the chef.
Pennies, Nickels, Dimes, and Quarters: #Change You Can #Believe In!
5 tags
fek:
The National - Squalor Victoria (White...
Stupid snow melting; can’t use it as an excuse for being late anymore. Son of a Snowy Bitch!
Stupid snow melting; can’t use it as an excuse for being late anymore. Son of a Snowy Bitch!
RT @wise_kaplan: The thing about your penis is, it will often surprise you.
RT @wise_kaplan: The thing about your penis is, it will often surprise you.
MID-AFTERNOON PILLOW FIGHT!!!! I JUST TOTALLY SMACKED YOU IN THE FACE WITH MY PILLOW:-)
http://soundcloud.com/deep-dark-robot I’ll checking them out in depth later. ROCK!
RT @DeathStarPR: We brought peace to the galaxy, stopped everyone having to vote & gave the planet next to Alderaan a better view. #TopT …
RT @DeathStarPR: We brought peace to the galaxy, stopped everyone having to vote & gave the planet next to Alderaan a better view. #TopT …
Never forget: God Gave Rock And Roll To You.
Never forget: God Gave Rock And Roll To You.
“They say you need food, water, clothing, and shelter to live, but really… if you...”
– Chuck, on the topic of thriftiness (via chuckhistory)
“Life must go on, I forget just why.”
– Edna St. Vincent Millay
Faced with the “absurd,” some persons begin a mechanical life and do not understand life.
(via fuckyeahexistentialism)
6 tags
foster: some dude in georgia started it
eiseley: is that in your article??/
oh yeah nm
howd you find that out???
foster: you just look up who the url belongs to, and it tells you
eiseley: yeah but that doesnt mean he started it
i want to know who executed the VERY first icing.
go
foster: jesus
jesus did
eiseley: nope
judas
that traitor
foster: wrong
wrong wrong wrong
eiseley: jesus iced judas?
WTFFFFFFFF
omg tell me everythign you know
foster: well
they were sitting around one day
and jesus fucked up the water/wine trick and ended up with this awful white shit
(he was using cloudy water)
eiseley: what a twat!
foster: and he was like, lo, this bullshit
tasted it, it tasted like dick, so he gave it bubbles and it was okay
eiseley: howd he do that?
foster: he's jesus, he's fucking magic
eiseley: oh right
foster: and this solved a problem: all the girls who went to nazareth high didn't get crunk because they thought wine tasted like shit
and i mean, talk about picky
(they were the original JAPs, as they were all still jews and many of them were literally princesses, except for the whores, who were literally whores, and they were the "down" chicks who'd just drink whatever because they weren't picky.)
anyway
jesus had been looking to bag a jap for a while, now, and so one night, at a rager, boom, he busts out the new drink
still tastes like shit, so one of his contemporaries Smiras (which was eventually corrupted by the Russians into Smirnoff) was like, bro, we're in the middle of the fucking desert. you think these girls are going to drink that bullshit if it's warm?
jesus was like, guess you've got a point
so he made it cold, because he's magical
and boom, next think you know, every Tiffany Heart Bracelet-wearing princess in the land from Nazareth HS is putting it down like it's water, because it tastes better than water, and also, gets them drunk, and they can tell their parents they didn't know the difference
eiseley: okay...but how did it become a BRO phenomenon???
foster: so judas is like, dude, you make it for them, but not us?
eiseley: oh right right.
foster: and jesus was like, fuck you man, you're always harshing my magic
have you actually tried it? drink it, go ahead and drink it. try it.
and judas drank it, and jesus was like HEY EVERYONE LOOK JUDAS IS DRINKING THE GIRLY DRINK I MADE
YOU GOT [INSERT ARAMAIC WORD FOR 'ICED'], BRO!
eiseley: gahahhahahhahahahahahhahhahahahhahahahaha
foster: judas was embarrassed, and then later, sold jesus out to the romans, and he was like, you just got CHRICED, BRO.
the end.
